I recently discoverered this website by social worker and writer, Brene Brown. Her area of expertise is shame research and how struggling with shame gets in the way of our becoming ourselves and living lives of authenticity that will allow us to connect more honestly with others.
I knew I really liked this woman when I read her perspective on coolness on her blog. She calls it an "emotional straightjacket" and writes,
"The greatest casualty of the endless pursuit of cool is connection. When we don't let people see and know our true selves, we sacrifice connection. Without connection, we struggle for purpose and meaning."
As someone who has been struggling for a sense of purpose and a meaning to my life, along with this nagging feeling of alienation from connection with others, this really resonated with me.
Am I lonely because I want people to think I am cool more than I want people to know the authentic Sara?
And am I ashamed of this authentic person? Where did I get the message that I am supposed to be a certain way, like certain things, feel certain ways? Why have I been wasting my life afraid to try something, express something, experiment with something because I am not good enough, perfect enough, cool enough?
I want to start a journey of figuring out exactly who the authentic Sara is and to fight against my tendency to abandon what I want to do out of fears of imperfection.
I bought this book as a starting point.
The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown.
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